How do you bring back those who are lost?

Parables of the Lost and Found

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In the parables in Luke 15, the sheep wanders, the piece of silver is lost, and the prodigal son wastes his inheritance in riotous living. But the shepherd searches the wilderness, the woman sweeps the house, and the forgiving father watches for his son’s return, ready with a warm welcome home.

These parables remind us that as the Savior’s undershepherds, we have the responsibility to help others—to heed the call from President Thomas S. Monson to “reach out and rescue those who have fallen by the wayside, that not one precious soul will be lost.”

You're probably wondering why I have this up. It was a link to the first thing I saw on the lds.org website, something that's been on my mind for a long time. Often times I see my younger brother posting things he shouldn't say to his friends on facebook. And when I try to confront him and tell him he probably shouldn't, he tells me what my mother always told me.. to not try to force my opinions on others, but to lead by example.. to not judge. I hate that stupid phrase "you shouldn't judge." What I am really feeling inside is not the urge to judge, but rather concern! Concern for the welfare of my own family members and the salvation of their souls! The same kind of concern you read about in the Book of Mormon by the prophets and people who care about others from the bottom of their heart.

My mother always said that she has to let her kids do what they want, make whatever choices they can and learn from experience, in hope that they will someday turn out good. Like, making all the bad choices now and then repenting right before a mission is the right path? But it's not! Even counsel from the modern day Apostles have said so, such as Elder Christofferson in his talk Moral Discipline.

How is letting them do what they want really leading by example? I honor, love, and respect my mother a lot for raising us. But I wish she didn't give up on her kids so easily. Consequences for wrong actions should have been more thoroughly dealt with. Of course, there are always future consequences for bad choices, I'm not excusing that, but consequences for things well known in the house that are going on that shouldn't be should have been enforced. 

My brother also told me that everyone knows their own actions and when they are choosing good or bad. And that I should leave the preaching to the Prophets. I don't preach. In my mind I'm trying to do what the Savior wants.. in helping others with their salvation, reaching out and rescuing, especially before it's too late.

I've always had this problem in my family. I've studied the gospel principles..and in my heart and mind I know what is right, so I feel more accountable and I try to follow what I know and what my conscience (or the Holy Ghost) tells me what is right. So I stick up for it. But unfortunately, it wasn't very popular in my family and when I'd try to turn off a bad movie or tv show I was always told "here comes perfect Anna again. We'll just have to watch it while she's gone." That was always very hurtful to me me because I'm not perfect, I know I'm not, I just try my best for what I know and feel accountable for, choosing the right action over the wrong one. It's the little things, the little [good] choices we make each day that make us who we are and what we will become. And I know I don't make consistently right decisions every time, I wish I did. But I try my best to reconcile my wrong and make things better, especially if I don't feel at ease.

Me and Jonathan were also talking about this. Jesus Christ didn't pay for everyone's sins so we can make as many as we possibly can and then repent later when we feel like it. We shouldn't let Him pay in vain! God's not on our time, we're on His! We came to earth to make choices, yes.. but GOOD ones! My brother said he felt that I was "more worthy" and  that I need to learn humility. That is true, I probably do need to be more humble. But I am no more worthy than anybody else! Everyone has the exact same potential of being a good person, you just have to work at it. Being good, doesn't always come easy especially when there is such opposition coming towards you.

I guess my overall question is.. how do you help rescue the ones you love, without offending them? Or is the offense inevitable? Is it for their own good? Or does it just drive them further away? I know we all have to gain a testimony of the truth and of the divinity of the Atonement and for what Jesus Christ really did for us, for ourselves. Gain an appreciation for everything we have, for Heavenly Father, for our own lives and the things we've been given. I know I wasn't always at this point of spirituality that I am now, I'll admit. But if I had had someone there helping me along the way, I'm sure it wouldn't have taken so long to find what I now, truly enjoy. If there are any suggestions out there, or (positive) comments (I'm tired of negative ones I tend to always find on facebook) I'd like to hear them. Once again, I love my family to death.. I just don't always agree with how they live their lives..and it's hard to be an example when you're over 2,000 miles away. 

If you did have the patience to read this, I would appreciate a comment.

So.. we didn't luck out....

With an ultrasound.. BUT we got to hear the baby's heartbeat! (about 140 bpm :D) which was way cool. I have never been in (due to lack of money/health insurance and I didn't know about medicaid til about the time we were moving from Texas) so I was kind of nervous what was going to go on or if I, or the baby, was in a terrible condition. But the doctor was way surprised at how well I was doing. Note: I have yet to experience ANY pregnancy horror symptoms ie: nausea, vomiting, queasiness, haha STRETCH marks - thank goodness - at least not yet, varicose veins, smelling things and wanting to puke, or swelling feet and legs. Of course, I'm sure I'm prone to it later in the pregnancy, but so far it's been a very joyful experience. It's hard to sympathize with all those harsh comments and stories on websites and books that talk about how painful and annoying pregnancy is. I happen to love it! :D

Soo, since the doc said it'd probably be best to wait until I'm 20 weeks along (that way we can at least get a better chance at seeing what the gender is instead of wasting an ultrasound) we're scheduled to come in 2 weeks (the 16th - on my Mom's birthday haha woohoo). I'm sooooo excited :D Can't wait. I'm hoping for a girl and even me and Jonathan (when I first found out) had dreams the SAME night it'd be a girl. But he wants it to be a boy. The doc said he only heard 1 heartbeat but that doesn't promise anything, so who knows! haha.. Anyways, I'm excited and had a great day today. And now I'm going to go eat.

Miracle in My Stomach :)

Ohmyheckohmyheckohmyheck!

I just witnessed a miracle in my stomach! lol

I felt the baby move 3 times in the last few minutes!! What a crazy feeling. It just felt like 3 little taps, nothing too big, almost unnoticeable, but quite unforgettable. It just goes to show that Heavenly Father truly is looking out for us. Although I have felt lower abdomen pain probably due to what's called "round ligament pain" (because the uterus stretches) I have been praying the last few days (since I haven't had an ultrasound done yet, but probably will get one next week) that He would make it possible for the babe to move or kick or show something in there that told me it was alive so I could feel comforted about it. And my prayers were answered! What a great feeling. :D I wanted it to keep going but it was just a short little thing, but nonetheless I feel happy about it.

oh happy day! :)

For Behold, Are We Not All Beggars?

I posted this on facebook, but due to SO many opinionated people out there, I decided to not "publish" it so as to not start up another argument.. since I'm SO great at avoiding those lol..

1 And now, it came to pass that when king Benjamin had made an end of speaking the words which had been delivered unto him by the angel of the Lord, that he cast his eyes round about on the multitude, and behold they had fallen to the earth, for the fear of the Lord had come upon them.

2 And they had viewed themselves in their own carnal state, even less than the dust of the earth. And they all cried aloud with one voice, saying: O have mercy, and apply the atoning blood of Christ that we may receive forgiveness of our sins, and our hearts may be purified; for we believe in Jesus Christ, the Son of God, who created heaven and earth, and all things; who shall come down among the children of men.

3 And it came to pass that after they had spoken these words the Spirit of the Lord came upon them, and they were filled with joy, having received a remission of their sins, and having peace of conscience, because of the exceeding faith which they had in Jesus Christ who should come, according to the words which king Benjamin had spoken unto them.

4 And king Benjamin again opened his mouth and began to speak unto them, saying: My friends and my brethren, my kindred and my people, I would again call your attention, that ye may hear and understand the remainder of my words which I shall speak unto you.

5 For behold, if the knowledge of the goodness of God at this time has awakened you to a sense of your nothingness, and your worthless and fallen state—

6 I say unto you, if ye have come to a knowledge of the goodness of God, and his matchless power, and his wisdom, and his patience, and his long-suffering towards the children of men; and also, the atonement which has been prepared from the foundation of the world, that thereby salvation might come to him that should put his trust in the Lord, and should be diligent in keeping his commandments, and continue in the faith even unto the end of his life, I mean the life of the mortal body—

7 I say, that this is the man who receiveth salvation, through the atonement which was prepared from the foundation of the world for all mankind, which ever were since the fall of Adam, or who are, or who ever shall be, even unto the end of the world.

8 And this is the means whereby salvation cometh. And there is none other salvation save this which hath been spoken of; neither are there any conditions whereby man can be saved except the conditions which I have told you.

9 Believe in God; believe that he is, and that he created all things, both in heaven and in earth; believe that he has all wisdom, and all power, both in heaven and in earth; believe that man doth not comprehend all the things which the Lord can comprehend.

10 And again, believe that ye must repent of your sins and forsake them, and humble yourselves before God; and ask in sincerity of heart that he would forgive you; and now, if you believe all these things see that ye do them.

11 And again I say unto you as I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God, or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance, the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the mouth of the angel.

12 And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true.

13 And ye will not have a mind to injure one another, but to live peaceably, and to render to every man according to that which is his due.

14 And ye will not suffer your children that they go hungry, or naked; neither will ye suffer that they transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the devil spirit which hath been spoken of by our fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness.

15 But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another.

16 And also, ye yourselves will succor those that stand in need of your succor; ye will administer of your substance unto him that standeth in need; and ye will not suffer that the beggar putteth up his petition to you in vain, and turn him out to perish.

17 Perhaps thou shalt say: The man has brought upon himself his misery; therefore I will stay my hand, and will not give unto him of my food, nor impart unto him of my substance that he may not suffer, for his punishments are just—

18 But I say unto you, O man, whosoever doeth this the same hath great cause to repent; and except he repenteth of that which he hath done he perisheth forever, and hath no interest in the kingdom of God.

19 For behold, are we not all beggars? Do we not all depend upon the same Being, even God, for all the substance which we have, for both food and raiment, and for gold, and for silver, and for all the riches which we have of every kind?

20 And behold, even at this time, ye have been calling on his name, and begging for a remission of your sins. And has he suffered that ye have begged in vain? Nay; he has poured out his Spirit upon you, and has caused that your hearts should be filled with joy, and has caused that your mouths should be stopped that ye could not find utterance, so exceedingly great was your joy.

21 And now, if God, who has created you, on whom you are dependent for your lives and for all that ye have and are, doth grant unto you whatsoever ye ask that is right, in faith, believing that ye shall receive, O then, how ye ought to impart of the substance that ye have one to another.

22 And if ye judge the man who putteth up his petition to you for your substance that he perish not, and condemn him, how much more just will be your condemnation for withholding your substance, which doth not belong to you but to God, to whom also your life belongeth; and yet ye put up no petition, nor repent of the thing which thou hast done.

23 I say unto you, wo be unto that man, for his substance shall perish with him; and now, I say these things unto those who are rich as pertaining to the things of this world.

24 And again, I say unto the poor, ye who have not and yet have sufficient, that ye remain from day to day; I mean all you who deny the beggar, because ye have not; I would that ye say in your hearts that: I give not because I have not, but if I had I would give.

25 And now, if ye say this in your hearts ye remain guiltless, otherwise ye are condemned; and your condemnation is just for ye covet that which ye have not received.

26 And now, for the sake of these things which I have spoken unto you—that is, for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God—I would that ye should impart of your substance to the poor, every man according to that which he hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants.

27 And see that all these things are done in wisdom and order; for it is not requisite that a man should run faster than he has strength. And again, it is expedient that he should be diligent, that thereby he might win the prize; therefore, all things must be done in order.

28 And I would that ye should remember, that whosoever among you borroweth of his neighbor should return the thing that he borroweth, according as he doth agree, or else thou shalt commit sin; and perhaps thou shalt cause thy neighbor to commit sin also.

29 And finally, I cannot tell you all the things whereby ye may commit sin; for there are divers ways and means, even so many that I cannot number them.

30 But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not.

Mosiah chapter 4, Book of Mormon (italics, bold, underline added)

I was just studying that earlier today and a lot of things hit home to me. Repenting with a sincere heart, feeling exceeding joy, being forgiven, not judging others because of their circumstance, and always lending a helping hand. Because, are we not all beggars? Don't we all need something? Whether it be air, food, water, clothes, a roof over our head, good health, and good people around us. We have to admit, we did not come up with these material things ourselves.. and we are all beggars of a higher power.

Some people.. oyyy

Oyoyoyyy, I know this is supposed to be a happy place for writing... but sometimes some people make me so mad I don't know how else to get rid of my tension then by at least writing it somewhere.

I have a [inactive or nonmember] cousin who just LOVES getting under my nerves. He's going into law school, so naturally he loves arguing..and picking me for his victim. It has kind of died down for a few months.. but every so often he pops in and decides to make fun of me some way or another. I've even tried telling him I don't like arguing and that I don't want to do it (especially on facebook, how childish!), but he persists and blames it on his career choice..and then the snobbish statements turn into rude, hurtful comments.

I don't purposely go to his site and find things wrong with him or see how stupid I can make him feel. And I know this is silly facebook drama, but still there is no reason for a FAMILY member to be saying such things anywhere. Fine, if you wanna talk about how poor I am and how young I was to get married and start MY DREAM of having a family, go ahead and talk about it BEHIND MY BACK so I don't know.

I was actually happy today to be accepted by medicaid so we COULD go to the doctor. I haven't been to one at all and I'm 17 weeks right now. (I know, not really awesome, but it's been tough this last year..and we couldn't really help it) and making an appointment for next week made me really happy to possibly be able to see what the gender of our beloved offspring is. But his stupid comment about having no shame or no pride by exploiting or "taking advantage" of medicaid/the government is ridiculous! We don't have any health insurance besides that so unless I have my child on the street I won't get it properly taken care of. Sorry I always pay my taxes and do what's right to help out every body else in this country, why should I be denied some of the benefits? I am a hard worker, but every one has gone through a bit of a rough patch some time in their life and has needed help. And we help out when we can. I just don't see why it's such a big deal to other people.

I just wish he would take his attitude toward me and shove it down the toilet, cause his opinion is neither requested nor required.

100% Better!

I would just like to testify of the power of true forgiveness. For a while I had something on my mind that I just couldn't shake. I used the Atonement properly, prayed fervently..but still my conscience was being weighed down by my thoughts. I felt 95% forgiven, 95% free.

I talked to my bishop, last Sunday and since then I have felt so relieved. One thing he told me to do was to forgive myself and let go. I don't have to be burdened anymore. I just love the amazing power of Jesus Christ, of His ultimate gift of the Atonement and how it can totally take effect in our lives if we let it. I feel clean again, 100% forgiven. It's awesome. :)

Last night Jonathan and I were able to go to a temple session together. It was SO amazing to go back to the temple. We were about an hour or so away from one in Texas, but being right down the road from one in Rexburg is awesome. We plan to go at least once a week..and maybe hit up on the session in ASL. Either way, I feel really blessed to be able to go. I felt at peace and really happy. You could say my heart was "swollen with joy" :) if that better explains it.

I am just really happy to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. We were at Temple Square at the visitor's center during Christmas break, and just seeing how wonderful and organized our church is put together, I thought to myself, "I love our church!" It takes care of its people and others, physically and spiritually. It's one of the greatest gifts I have been given.

Anyways, that's all!

Hello New Year!!!

Sorry this is a bit late, as usual. But hay! At least I'm doing it..so that's good.

I..reeally love Rexburg. It reminds me of home, a bit bigger than North Pole, but just as much snow.. and a little bit warmer ;). Not quite as pretty as Alaska, but I'll take it over Texas. I'm even learning (and kind of being forced as I am Jonathan's personal unpaid taxi haha) to drive the stick and I drop him off and pick him up from school almost every day. I'm not as afraid to drive here since there are less drivers. I just hate the hills cause I'm afraid when I put the car in gear I'm going to roll back into somebody behind me! And that scares me. Yoikes!... and sadly, I stall the car just about every day. One day I'll get better, I promise.

We spent Christmas in Colorado with Jonathan's sister, and his family drove up from Texas unexpectedly as well, so that was cool. Denver sure is nice. It was a bit different than I would have celebrated Christmas (we focused on Call of Duty..more than Christ :{ ) There's always next year though. I definitely miss spending it with my family.. and it just wasn't quite the same with no snow this time.

After we left we made our way to Salt Lake City to see Temple Square. The next day we traveled to Payson to see my grandparents and it was AWESOME! They miss me so much and we could tell they didn't want to see us leave. Even Jonathan really loved being there. My grandparents shared a lot of stories with us, like when they served their mission in Norway (where my grandma grew up) and my grandpa in his old state just has a super funny sense of humor! Always stealing the sweets while my grandma wasn't looking. So funny. It made me sad we didn't get to be there for very long. But we told them we'd be back during a small school break, or during spring break. Can't wait.

Temple Square was beautiful, of course. We first watched the new Joseph Smith movie, the Prophet of the Restoration. That was great. We got to see Rose Hirt!.. I mean, Sister Hirt! there :) AND out of nowhere did I expect to see JESA!!!! That was soo awesome. So many people from Alaska that I knew. Felt good to see familiar faces.

Next we spent the day and a half in Logan with Jonathan's companion, Corey ,and that was cool. His dad owns the Dominos so he got us free pizza :) and we went to the USU basketball game. Then we played a game called Telestrations. It's kinda like the gossip game telephone, but instead you draw and pass it to the left and they try to guess it, and then the next left player tries to draw what they guessed, and you see how close (or very far away) they got to the original thought. Haha sooo fun. I wanna get that game! When we got to Rexburg we stayed with Kaitlin and Brandon and played Wii NBA Jam and I whooped the boys' butt with my computer! 3 games in a row! Soo funny.

Annnd that's about the extent of our vacation. A LOT of driving to get here. But I'm glad.

It's been a bit hard here having no furniture especially with my back on the floor each night (well, I guess I'm trying to sleep on my side so it's better for the baby). Our good friends Gustav and Andrea let us borrow their extra kitchen table and then bought us a blowup mattress, so that was VERY kind of them! I'm so thankful! (now we just need to get a pump that plugs into the wall..cause when the boys went shopping..they accidentally got a car adapter plug-in lol.. great for camping, not so great for apartment complexes!) So we shall see how we get that thing pumped up! But I am grateful otherwise..

And SOO grateful for all the people who continually pray for us (we definitely need it), all the people who have supported us in any way - by encouragement, monetary items or anything! It has so been gratefully appreciated. We couldn't have gotten this far without the help. THANK YOU!

Welp, just wanted to kinda keep people updated. Doing a rather lousy job, but I should be getting better now that our new apt has internet. Woohoo! :)

Love and miss my friends and family all around the world. <3

Anna