The Reason

So, I think I have figured it out. Sorry if this post happens to be super mushy. Oh well.


I've been thinking about Lydia the past few days, and why I really really love her. I mean, I love her in all sorts of different ways, but this reason I am about to tell you takes the cake.


Here is my number one reason why I love her.

She is just a really happy person. 

And she knows how to be happy..

 ...and her happiness makes me happy. It's very contagious. She is such an easy person to love.

On the days where I feel I am at my worst, I know she will still make me smile. She has the tendency to make a happy moment out of anything. Even when we are riding in the car, she makes me smile. Earlier in her car seat she was saying in a quiet voice, "la..la... lala.. la la.." and then all of a sudden said, "LA!" really loud. She repeated that pattern with a few other of her special baby words. They all made me laugh for some reason. Random, silly, and beautifully childlike.

While we were walking inside from our little snow storm, she was so thrilled to see so much snow, as the snow flurries were large. She laughed as they blew into her face and she repeated "lo!!" or "no!" back and forth followed by little squeals. It just always amazes me how she finds joy in the simple things.

Such a great reminder. 

Gosh, I love her so much! I love seeing her grow. She learns new things every day and I feel like I get to experience my childhood all over again vicariously through her.

She is quick to forgive and quick to be happy. Earlier today after her shower she was running back and forth between me and outside of the bedroom door in just her diaper. However, she got so excited as she was running to me she tripped and her cheek and nose hit my shin. She immediately started crying.. and I had a clue of how bad it felt because my shin actually hurt too as I said "owww" out loud. She cried in my arms as I tried to console her. After about a minute or two she calmed down (after I promised her milk) and she was happy again. After that she was content as she was jumping up and down on my bed. 

When she sees Jonathan leaving for work and we kiss goodbye, she says, "Gug!" for hug and then smiles as we give each other a hug. Then she comes over and wants a hug and kiss too. She'll also say, "love you, byyeee" when we leave. She is just so precious. I can't get over it. (Hay, you were forewarned about the mushyness).

Sometimes I allow her to fall back asleep in our bed when she wakes up in the morning and, even though I'm so bloody tired, I still lay awake and watch her sleep so peacefully. Just as I did when she was first born. She is so precious to me. 

She is such a sweet soul. It's funny,  at this moment she is playing with her toys right in front of me (and ripping out pages of her books! Got after her for that one haha) and she doesn't even know I'm writing about her. She doesn't know just how much I love her. I could never bare to lose her. I think of all the parents, or those wanting to be parents, who have lost their child due to illness, death, or have gone astray and it breaks my heart. I never want to lose her.

I cherish every hug around my neck and every sweet kiss she plants on my lips. I wouldn't trade those for the world. She is the light of my life.

She is my little sunshine.